I have written before about marriage and about how I got married young, at least to some people and how some people questioned our decision and its sustainability given our age and situation. Most people still presume we are newlyweds when they meet one of us and we have friends that are still thought to be dating until the rings are noticed, just because of their ages (and that is what is normal this day and age).
I saw this article posted by a friend who was married a year younger than me and I just felt like I should share it with other people: The Case for Getting Married Young by Karen Swallow Prior.
Culturally, young adults have increasingly come to see marriage as a “capstone” rather than a “cornerstone”—that is, something they do after they have all their other ducks in a row, rather than a foundation for launching into adulthood and parenthood.
Like the author states in the article, there is much pressure these days to get an education, focus on getting a career and then getting married. That we have to have all of our eggs in a basket before we should be entering a legal union with another person. But as we all go to school longer, take longer to get established and go into more debt because of all that garbage, it takes longer to attain the status that society thinks we need to have before getting married.
Plus, the article is frank about some of the benefits of being married and the downsides to young singleness.
I am not saying everyone should get married “young.” But, maybe people should consider that our must-have culture leads us to sometimes lose out on things because we HAVE to do so much before getting married. Sometimes having another person to support and have support you is a good thing. Marriage can provide a security that you don’t necessarily get with co-habitation and it allows for growth together as opposed to apart.
I like what the article said. I am glad my marriage was a cornerstone, not a capstone of my adult life. I think it has done a lot to shape who I am, who we are.